I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
