You're completely useless in the revolution.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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