oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
