Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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