Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize