All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
