when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
