Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize