Cold hands, warm shart.
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize