i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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