I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize