you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
