so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
