I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
