Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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