I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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