Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
