plz talk dirty to me
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
