maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I am spending my child support on dildos
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
i believe in u and ur pee
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