3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
