your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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