I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
