did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
He kissed a someone with a penis
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
