u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
