first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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