Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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