as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
