'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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