I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
