The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize