OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Randomize
