Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
