why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
