just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
