When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
