And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
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