y did u give ur computer a hand job?
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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