so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
