dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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