Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
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