i permit you to call me
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
