Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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