He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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