OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
