Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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