Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
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