after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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