If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Randomize
