Heybabeimwearingurpanties
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
