I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
So vagazzling was a success
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize