I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
